Figure 09
by melody unwinding
Summary: [oneshot] He was dieased and couldn't stop it. It drove her away, away till the point that he had died. Now the only thing he wants is her, but its the one thing that he thinks he can't have. But is their love strong enough to make it through the bump in


**Disclaimer : **I don't own anything but the plot…and the idea. Linkin Park owns the song, so get off my back!

**Chapter Warnings : **Nothing but a little lovin'.

* * *

**Figure .09**

He was like a broken record, repeating the same dirty habits over each time continuously. Betraying her, exploding at her—he couldn't help but let his calm façade dissipate to reveal the rage he unleashed. But he always came back, groveling at her feet to take him back. Even though she did, it didn't stop the cycle that his life had taken to. He would always tell her that it would be no more, but he always went and touched another woman, drinking until he had forgotten his oath to her. He was diseased and he couldn't stop anything from happening—the devil had entered his thoughts, telling him to do it—do it all.

"Fine! Leave! See if I care—you were just another fucking trophy here!" He hollered at her mildly intoxicated, his nerves weakening by every shout that was heard. Her eyes, showing the hurt and pain that she had suffered through, lined with tears, ready to spill. She chuckled darkly at the man, about ready to make her exit like the other times before.

"You know, you are still the same _perverted_ asshole you were when I met you. I don't know why I keep coming back to you _thinking_ that you could've possibly changed." She said, sniffing softly. "Well listen here Houshi, this is the last time I come crawling back to you."

"Asshole? Who the hell are you calling an asshole?" He ground out, trying not to get a heart attack. "You've been a bitch about my tiny habits, so I wouldn't be the one to talk darling." She stared at him, not believing what was spewing from his mouth that she had kissed over and over.

"_Fuck you_; fuck you and all your damn whores! You don't need me around when you've got those bimbo's hanging off of you like they're damn medals!" She screamed, tears breaking free. He was about to retort loudly with a rage-driven curse when he actually watched the tears fall down her fragile face. What was he doing? Out of all the time he'd known her, never had he seen her cry before. It broke him down all over again watching the crystallized liquid slide down her pale cheeks.

He was silent, watching her as she grabbed her coat and stormed out of his apartment into the dark hallway. His heart fell into the pits of his stomach and he finally realized how much of an ass he had been. Could she ever forgive him? He shook his head, answering his own question.

"No, Miroku you've fucked up big time—and this time you're not getting her back." He went to sit down when he recalled that he had never placed a chair here. But he let himself fall. He was tired, weakened mentally and physically. His bottom hit the hardwood floor hard, but he didn't acknowledge the pain, for there was an immense hurt shattering from within his chest. Unconsciously he gripped at the place where his heart was, almost trying to stop the fiery jabs.

He had lost her, and she'd never come back to him. He'd never have a chance to tell her that he loved her, like he had failed to do all the times before. He'd never get to share his worries, his fears, his hopes and dreams. Everything was pulled away from a single action—drinking. It was the main ingredient of ruining his life, fucking him up and his love life.

_Nothing ever stops all these thoughts and the pain attached to them  
__Sometimes I wonder why this is happening_

Miroku raised himself from the ground, anger crossing his face in a grim expression. He made his way over to the alcohol cabinet and quickly threw it open. Shelves and shelves of vodkas, rums, liqueurs, and other poisons that he chose to taste every now and then revealed themselves to him, calling out to him. He reached inside with both hands, picking up the deadly drinks. He looked at them, the clear liquid, the brown liquid, and the almost black liquid.

"I'm not going to go through this again!" He growled. "This is for Sango!" He threw the bottles with as much force as he could across the room where they broke, leaving a trail down the wall. He picked up more, repeating the action over and over until there was nothing left but the broken glass and stains. His chest heaved up and down, his breath's ragged from the sudden burst of fury. But his rampage was slowly dying as he turned and slumped against the wall. His legs could barely hold him as a look of depression spread across his boyish face. They gave out and he slid to the ground, his body barely looking alive.

"Why?" He whispered to himself, bringing his arms up to his face. "Why do I always do this?" No body was here, he was all alone. He could finally express himself the way he wanted to. The barrier of which held back his emotions broke and they overflowed from his violet eyes. He had no pride left; the only thing that mattered to him was lost, the pain overwhelming him. He had lost her. And he had done it, practically urging her to leave him.

_It's like nothing I can do can distract me when  
__I think of how I shot myself in the back again_

He couldn't remember much, but he had found himself on his couch with a blanket on. His head throbbed and his body felt weak. He went to sit up when a hand on his shoulder pushed him back down to the confines of the couch. He noticed that it wasn't a feminine hand, and his heart sank.

"Don't try to get up." A low rumbling voice rang from behind him. "You'll only experience more pain." Miroku moaned, everything glowing with hurt.

"Wha-how did I get here?" He asked lightly, raising a reddened hand to his face. His friend walked into his gaze, sitting down on the coffee table adjacent from the couch. He had long black hair that flowed like silk to his waist. Like Miroku, his eyes were a vibrant violet and had a handsome face. Though unlike Miroku's messy clothes, his friend wore casual baggy jeans and a red tee shirt.

"I came over cause I was having a little problem, but when you didn't answer I just used my key-" He began.

"How on earth did you get a key?" Miroku asked a little louder than he had anticipated.

"Oh you know, Sango made me a copy since I usually hang around here." He said, giving a slight laugh. Miroku moaned once again, only this time because of her name. It echoed through his head and wouldn't stop bouncing off the walls.

_Cause from these infinite words I can say  
__I put all the pain you gave to me on display_

"What?" He said, wondering for his friend's welfare. "What's wrong Miroku?"

"Nothing Inuyasha, just tell me how I got here." He said exhausted. Inuyasha nodded and continued his story.

"When I got inside it was all dark and I could smell alcohol like it was a perfume. I thought that you were going to be piss drunk lying passed out somewhere odd, but I found you crying in the corner." Miroku closed both of his eyes at that statement, feeling heavily embarrassed. "I went to ask you what was wrong, but you just ignored me. So, like the good guy I'm not, I picked you up and put you on the couch. Then later I figured out that you had totaled your whole supply of liquor, not drinking any of it." Miroku was silent, not finding anything to say.

"What's wrong? Why did I find you fucked up last night?" Inuyasha asked, giving a lighter tone. Miroku looked up at his friend for the first time today, letting him see all the hurt and pain that he was feeling.

"She left me—for good." He barely whispered. Inuyasha caught it, but could barely voice his concerns. He knew that his friend had a small drinking problem that always led him back to his player days, and that he couldn't help it.

"Miroku…" Inuyasha started, trying to find the right words. "You need help." Miroku's face turned to anger, astonished that his friend would even suggest such a thing.

"Inuyasha! Never would I have though that you would say such ludicrous!" Miroku huffed, but Inuyasha stopped him before he could get on the ball.

"Shut the fuck up." He hollered, getting the man to settle down and stare at him with disdain. "Do you love her? Do you want to salvage what you may have left? Do you want her back, and make everything right this time?"

"I don't see-" Miroku started but Inuyasha made a point of getting him to say the words he wanted to hear.

"Do you, or don't you?" He asked, leaning forward with a menacing tone in his voice. Miroku looked down and sighed heavily.

"I love her too much that I can't even put words to it. I don't even think 'I love you' sums it up." He said regrettably.

"I know someone—you can do it; for her." Inuyasha said confidently, digging in his pocket for his cell phone.

_And didn't realize instead of setting it free  
__I took what I hated and made it apart of me_

She was in shambles, forcing herself not to think of him. But every time she looked _anywhere _she thought of him. Everything reminded her of him, and it was hard to just forget. Of all of the good times they had spent together, she had always been so happy. He had once been loving, and he hardly ever drank—but things changed. She turned away from her thoughts and put her face back in the pillow. She had to move on, even if it tore her up inside out.

_Never goes away, never goes away_

He looked at his pitiful self in the mirror, but it wasn't only his reflection there. She was standing there too; smiling at him with the smile that he had kissed so many times. Her chocolate eyes bore into his own, almost feeling his soul. Her messy black hair framed her pale, yet beautiful face. Her naturally red lips were a little swollen; from what he would expect was their playtime. He placed his hand against the mirror, tracing the contours of her face. He could faintly smell her own fragrance that he loved so much, but he needed it to be renewed.

"Sango…" He whispered as her face vanished from the reflective glass and he was left staring at a broken man. She was still running through his system, the blood pumping through his veins, the air he breathed in, the food he tasted. She was everywhere—she _was_ him.

_And now you've become apart of me  
__You'll always be right here  
__You've become apart of me  
__You'll always be my fear  
__I can't separate myself from what I've done  
__Giving up apart of me  
__I've let myself become you_

He didn't know where he was going, he just needed out. His first appointment was at 4:30, and he wasn't about to miss it. He had time to waste, and he wasn't going to spend it sitting on his couch, staying in the very environment that she was still floating in. He left his apartment, wearing a pair of grey sweat pants and an old ragged brown sweatshirt that he had kept from his teen days. His hair was a mess, and his face was even paler than it had been from the beginning. He stepped outside onto the busy sidewalk, letting himself fall into the heavy traffic.

His legs began to drag him downwards, down the hill, past the bars and restaurants—straight to a small café that brought back too many memories. He stood in front of the small shop, just staring in the window at the various people seated inside. His eyes drifted to the corner where they had always sat, and he imagined them sitting there, laughing at the world. He turned his head down and shook it lightly, knowing that those days were gone.

Sango… 

Even when she flowed through his very system, when her scent lingered on everything that was his, just saying her name felt like death to him. It pained him to even _think_ her name, yet it was impossible not to. He was tempted to go find her, but he was in shambles and wasn't sure what to do with himself.

_Hearing your name the memories come back again  
__I remember when it started happening_

He began to walk away from the café, but then he heard a voice that brought a fluttering into his stomach. He whipped back towards the café and was afraid that it wasn't exactly who he was really seeing. But he _had_ to believe. He stared into the window at her, only to see a zombie that didn't look to be the one that had taken his heart and mind. Her hair was tied back loosely, as if she hadn't brushed it in a long time. Her face was almost whiter than his own, and dark circles danced under her dull eyes. She hadn't made any attempt to act like everything was fine—she looked like she was dying.

Time had almost stilled for him to see her, even if the world sped on by him. At first, all he could do was stare, imprinting her face in his memories, even if she wasn't what everyone else would call beautiful. But as time wore on—seconds into minutes—more came with them. His feelings overrode his mind, and soon he was more vulnerable than he had ever been in his life. He hated to feel this way—but he knew he brought it upon himself.

_See you and every though I had and then  
__The thoughts slowly found words attached to them_

She hadn't wanted to go out, but Kagome had made her. She had said that Inuyasha was meeting her for a coffee at some place, but she hadn't known that it was going to be _this_ one. Too many memories attached themselves to this place, and it was killing her to be there. But she didn't want to ruin anything for Kagome and Inuyasha. So she stood off to the side, clenching her coffee in a tight grip as she stared out, can't helping to think of all the times she had come here with Miroku.

Her heart still beat for him, she still longed for him, but her mind was too steady to let these useless emotions override her sense of living. She had cried for him, she mourned for him—hell, she still wanted him. But she had to stay away, she had to remain strong for not only herself, but for her friends. She'd never admit it, but somehow, a part of him lived inside of her, the place that she kept sacred and secret.

_And I knew as they escaped away  
__I was committing myself to them and everyday_

"Sango," Kagome's voice sounded through her many thoughts. "Are you feeling all right?" She looked at her friend with her blank expression that she had taken to over the night.

"Fine." She croaked out, worrying her friend greatly. Inuyasha came back over; carrying two coffee's in his hands, handing one out to Kagome.

"Jesus Sango, you look like shit." He said, taken slightly aback from her sudden appearance. "You look as bad as Miroku." He added a little softer. At his name she winced slightly, but not enough for them to notice. She looked up at the mention of his condition, hoping that he was lying.

"What?" She asked, her face still a ghastly white.

"Miroku—you look as bad as him." He said, keeping a firm stare with her. "You're not the only one feeling these side-effects."

_I regret saying those things cause now I see that I  
__Took what I hated and made it apart of me_

She was taken aback by Inuyasha's comment. He began drinking his coffee, but his eyes never left hers. She thought that he would just move on, go grab another bottle of vodka with a few blondes off to the side. At first she thought that there might be a chance that he would come back and grovel at her feet, but then she remembered all the pain he had caused her.

"Side-effects?" Kagome asked, looking between the two who were intensely staring at one another. "Am I missing something?" No one answered her, but the silence grew longer and Kagome grew confused.

"H-how do you know?" Sango asked quietly, her heart being twisted in every direction. He took another gulp, prepping himself for the inevitable.

"I saw him—the alcohol, the mess—everything." He said, almost as if he was trying to hint at something. "I was surprised that he hadn't gone and slit his wrists by now." At that comment Kagome chose to intervene, finding the conversation steering off into dangerous grounds.

"Inuyasha!" She said grabbing onto his arm and beginning to drag him away. "A word please." Sango looked away from the bickering couple and glanced outside at the darkening sky. Large rain clouds were rolling in, creating a background for how she felt. The curses grew louder and Sango knew she had to go—get away from everyone. She dropped her coffee into the nearest bin and began to drag herself onto the streets, sadness evident in her once bright eyes.

_Never goes away, never goes away_

He watched her, even when his heart began to throb like it had never been working. His legs were rooted to the spot, and his eyes were focused on her angelic face. Even though he had no clue what was perspiring inside the café, he had a mild idea that his name was thrown around in the mix a few times. But, just as he had convinced himself that he was no longer needed, he saw her exit, leaving her full coffee for the garbage. He wasn't sure what had come over him, but he began to go after her, the beating of his heart becoming his strength to chase after the one he loved.

_And now you've become apart of me  
__You'll always be right here  
__You've become apart of me  
__You'll always be my fear  
__I can't separate myself from what I've done  
__Giving up apart of me  
__I've let myself become you_

The rain began to fall moments after she exited to the lively streets, and as soon as the force grew, the road become empty as her heart. She kept her eyes on the concrete before her, focusing on the tapping of her shoes on the solid to distract her from what her heart was trying to get through. But the more she focused, the more she realized that there was another pair of footsteps behind her. She raised her head as one particularly big drop landed on her, letting her eyes glance back at the figure that was stalking her. But instead of the old man that she had thought would be hanging back, she saw the only thing that could freeze her.

"Miroku…" She whispered as he stopped and their gazes locked.

"Sango…" He mimicked, only with her name as it ran through his lungs. Even after everything she had gone through, her heart still beat for him—and always would.

_Never goes away, never goes away  
__Never goes away, never goes away_

The rain began its onslaught of tears, pounding loudly on rooftops and nearby vehicles. The constant pitter-patter was the only sound that was heard in the tense silence that stood between the two. A low rumbling in the distance signaled a thunder storm, but it was almost as if they were standing in an abyss void of any sound, save for the beating of their own hearts. It was almost pathetic to the man to just stand there, being at a complete loss of words. In all his years, he had always something up his sleeve, something to woo the ladies. But then again, he had never been in love before.

"Why are you here?" She finally asked, her voice strong and loud against the background noises. His brain began to slowly process her question, looking for something to say that would not only reassure her, but repress the depression that had settled in his soul.

"I—Sango you have to hear me ou—" He tried, taking a few steps closer, his voice as desperate as a starving child.

"I've heard enough bullshit from you to last me a lifetime. I'm through with listening." Anger began to push its way through to her words, the strong voice becoming reckless with emotion.

"I'm sorry, I was drunk!" He said, those words coming naturally to him.

"Sorry? _Sorry?_" She said, a dark laughter escaping. "When was the last time 'sorry' ever saved someone? When was the last time 'sorry' mended a broken heart? Tell me Houshi, because I'm _dying_ to know!" This time she was the one who approached, rage oozing from her aura.

"If I could turn back time I would! But this isn't a fairy tale; this is reality." He said, throwing his arms in the air.

_Get away from me  
__Give me my space back you gotta just go_

"You're fucking right this isn't a fairy tale! There's always a happy ending, and this is by far the _shittiest_ ending I could ask for!" She roared, only a few feet distancing the two.

"This isn't an ending; there's no closure!" He countered.

"Closure? You want _closure_?" She said before raising her fist in a menacing action. "I'll show your sorry ass closure!"

"That's not what I meant!" He said, trying to steer the argument to non-violent terms. "What I meant was—"

"I don't give a _fuck_ what you meant to say! I just want you to leave, you caused enough damage here!"

"I understand that you're angry Sango, and by all means, let it all out. I'm sure I deserve it." He said, almost regrettably.

_Everything comes back to memories of you  
__I've kept it in and now I'm letting you know_

"You're damn right you deserve it!" She screamed. "You think that you can go and _feel_ other women up, and _expect_ me to be okay with it?"

"I did not—"

"Whenever we went out to dinner, you were always flirting with the waitresses, complimenting them. But tell me Miroku, when was the last time _you_ called _me_ beautiful? When was the last time you told me how lucky you were to have me? When was the last time that you went out of your way to do something romantic for me? _Tell me_!"

"Now don't go the—"

"_Tell me!_" He fell silent. "That's right; you were always out drinking, leaving me alone at home." Tears began to fall down her face as she continued. "You're a fucking drunk! I tried to help you, but you wouldn't let me! You practically _kicked_ me out of your life!"

"Sango, I never meant…" He trailed off, finally feeling all of the pain that he caused her to hit him full force.

"I tried so hard to make you happy! I tried so hard to convince myself that I was pretty enough to be with you. I tried to make believe that you loved me! I spent too much time pretending, and now I have to face the consequences."

"That isn't true." He said quietly, but she still managed to catch onto his words.

"Oh shut up, we both know that I wasn't exactly the type of woman that you liked. You like them big breasted, with tiny waists and blonde hair. You liked them easy and thin who also served up body shots. I'm not _that_ stupid." She gave a rather loud sob, her body shaking with the tremor.

"That's all a lie," he said stepping closer, his hands reaching for an embrace.

_I've let you go so get away from me  
__Give me my space back you gotta just go_

"Get away from me!" She screamed, batting violently at his outdrawn arms. "Don't _touch_ me!"

He ignored her screams and let his arms encircle her waist as her fists pounded violently against his chest. She was strong, but he could barely feel the blows. The only thing he could feel was the burning sensation in his chest.

"The only girl I've ever wanted is you." He said, looking into her eyes as tears continued to leak down her face.

"You're lying!" She accused him, the pain of what he caused increasing tenfold. "Haven't you led me on enough? I've already fallen off that cliff, don't make me go through that again." Her voice quieted as her words wore on.

"It's hard to believe, but I've realized that I'm nothing without you. No matter how many women I have around me, all I want to do is curl up next to you. I could be surrounded by beautiful women, but only your beauty is the one that reigns above all."

"Please, don't…" she whispered, shaking her head lightly.

_Everything comes down to memories of you  
__I've kept it in and know I'm letting you know  
__I've let you go…_

"You're beautiful, you always have been. I was so lucky to have you; I didn't realize how much you meant to me till I lost you. I'm a fool, I'm a jerk, I'm anything you want me to be." He said, tears of his own beginning to fall gracefully down his boyish face. He gave a rather wet smile, his lips trembling.

"I'd always deny it, but now I know that it's real. I don't know if I can sum it up into those three words, but it's the only ones close enough." A rather large onslaught of tears began dripping down his face as he let out a few choked sobs of his own. "Sango, I love you more than the world can tell. You're are my other half—you are my heart and soul. I love you more than those words can say. Without you by my side, I don't know if I could go on."

"Miroku, please don't feed me this." She sobbed as his hands drew themselves up to her face. He held it as she leaned her forehead against his own. She continued to murmur incoherent words as she grabbing onto his arms, trying to find something to ease her heart.

"Sango, I love you; I want to spend the rest of my life with you!" He said, raising her head to meet his eyes. The same eyes that were pouring out tears—the ones that had always been strong and confident. The ones that had held no emotion were a raging tsunami of everything that was going on inside of him.

"Why are you telling me this? What is it supposed to accomplish?" She asked quietly, sniffing as her tears continued to fall with the rain.

"I want you." He whispered. "I want to mend my ways and start fresh. I want to be the man you always wanted me to be. I want to make you smile; I want to make you laugh. I want you to have my babies." He gave a weak laugh.

"Miroku, you can't just give up drinking like it's a game." She countered weakly.

"I'm getting help, I'm getting help." He said, his hope fading with every word leaving her mouth. "And I'll get a better job and…" He stopped to think.

"You're what?" She asked quizzically.

"Inuyasha helped me—gave me that nudge. I'll stop drinking, I'm getting help from a professional. I'll be good to you."

_And now you've become apart of me  
__You'll always be right here  
__You've become apart of me  
__You'll always be my fear  
__I can't separate myself from what I've done  
__Giving up apart of me  
__I've let myself become you_

She looked at him, trying to believe what he was saying was sincere. Her righteous side was telling her that it was just like all the other times he came crawling back to her. But for once, her heart was getting the message through more clearly. Never had she seen a man break down for her, never had she witness a man nearly beg for her love, tell her the one thing that she'd been dying to hear.

"Sango, I'm begging here. You're the only one I want, and if you won't have me then I might die without your presence." He said, rubbing her cheeks gently with the pads of his thumbs.

"Miroku, I don't know what to say…" She whispered, trying to find something that would make her happy once again.

"Just say that you love me."

"Miroku, I don't know…" she became uneasy. "How do I know it won't be different then the times before? How do I know you won't run off and do the same thing again?"

Miroku was loosing all his momentum, and was acting purely on instinct. When he opened his mouth to answer her, his heart nearly pushed it out.

"Marry me."

"W-what?" She stared at him, completely astonished by what had just come out of his mouth. He let go of her face, but grabbed one of her hands. Slowly he kneeled down in front of her, his soaked sweatpants acting as anchors.

"Sango Taijiya, will you do me the greatest honor of being my wife?" He asked, his voice leaking emotion with every word. She was hesitant, shocked, anything else other than happy—or so it seemed to him. They stayed in that position, Miroku down on one knee holding her right hand. Every last string of hope that he had flew away when she still didn't answer. He dropped her hand and lowered his eyes, heaving a great sigh.

"A happy ending is only meant for fairy tales." He muttered to himself as he closed his eyes, shutting out the world around him.

"But there's a rare time that they can happen in reality." He heard her whisper, only inches away from him. He opened his eyes and there she was, smiling at him before her. He opened his mouth to try and make some sense out of this when she leaned forward and gave him an almost needy kiss. Her lips had missed the presence of his own against hers, and the familiar warmness surged through her system.

"I'd have said yes to you from the first time I met you." She whispered when she broke the everlasting kiss. He gave her a chaste one, smiling as he realized that she hadn't rejected him.

_I've let myself become you  
__I've let myself become lost inside these thoughts of you_

"I'll be everything you ever wanted me to be. I'll be the perfect husband; I'll be the perfect lover. I'll be a hopeless romantic!" He ranted on, his arms holding her close.

"I don't want you to be anything but yourself." She whispered before adding louder. "And besides, we all know that deep down you are a hopeless romantic." He laughed as a slight blush stained his cheeks, knowing that he was a bit of a romantic inside of him.

"I swear Sango I'm going to make you the happiest woman ever." He promised as he gave her yet another chaste and loving kiss. He stared at her, taking in her features when something seemed out of place. There was a secret that was being contemplating inside of her mind, whether or not to tell him at that moment.

"Sango," he said, his voice growing more depressed with each syllable. She gave him a smile before embracing him tightly. He returned the act, but he was puzzled by her sudden actions.

"Miroku, there's something I need to tell you." She whispered into his ear.

"Anything love, anything at all." She hesitated for a moment and Miroku was afraid that she wasn't going to tell him. But then her warm breath hit his ear and he could feel her voice coming shortly after.

"I'm pregnant." For a split-second he froze up, but after that he was nearly squeezing the life out of her. Suddenly his heart felt complete and he didn't feel like such a lonely man. A large smile made its way across his face and he pulled back to look at his fiancée.

"I'm going to be a dad." He whispered, before nearly screaming it after. "I'm going to be a dad!"

Sango laughed as Miroku pulled her up off the ground and swung her around. The rain began to let up and a crease in the clouds let a sliver of sunlight break through. He put Sango down on the ground before him, the grin not planning on leaving his face for a while.

"You've just made me the happiest man on the planet." He said before breaking into more acts of joy.

_Giving up apart of me  
__I've let myself become you_

* * *

The Unfortunate End

* * *

**A/U : **Whoever said that there was no such thing as happy endings? Ahaha. Just so you all know, this was probably the top one that I enjoyed most writing. It came together really well, and I love it so much. This is probably my most favored oneshots! So please send your feedback, I'd like to know any way to improve, whether it be a spelling or grammar error.

Arriverdici,  
Melody Unwinding


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